Veronica (part 2)

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Veronica
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Re: Veronica (part 2)

Post by Veronica » Sat Jan 21, 2023 10:04 am

"Give yourself a break."

I must have subconsciously taken that to heart.
Was woken up at 10:10 pm last night by dad calling from hospital. In my rush to get the phone I neglected to turn on any lights and promptly crashed full force down onto the ground, doing tremendous damage to my right big toe, possible fracture or strain or the titanium rods I have from a previous surgery were broken off the bone. It's to swollen for xray or MRI at this point. my nurse niece and I think if I baby it for the weekend by Monday it can probably be examined and dealt with. Holy wow we have a lot of nerves in our body, even breathing deep hurts. Cant wear shoes or drive at this point so I'm breaking indeed and taking this rest that is upon me.

the chart for home at 10:10 has partile angles if that means anything, and my natal Pluto on them.

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Jim Eshelman
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Re: Veronica (part 2)

Post by Jim Eshelman » Sat Jan 21, 2023 10:21 am

Ow! I am so sorry I wasn't more specific. :(

We do tend to be forced to rest when we refuse to do it voluntarily.
Veronica wrote:
Sat Jan 21, 2023 10:04 am
the chart for home at 10:10 has partile angles if that means anything, and my natal Pluto on them.
Yes, natal Pluto on EP 0°21'.

But in the event chart, Jupiter was setting. "Meaning of the moment" was, indeed, to give you some downtime, it seems.

In terms of the meaning in your life, STATIONARY transiting Uranus was octile natal Pluto 0°07': This is a time in your life demanding significant change and rearrangement of basic things. Transiting Mars (still near its station) has been sitting very close to your natal Eastpoint in RA for about a week (t Mars angular at 13°02' Tau, your EP-a 13°07' Tau). Uranus to Pluto and Mars to an angle screams accident + things breaking.
Jim Eshelman
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Veronica
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Re: Veronica (part 2)

Post by Veronica » Sun Jan 22, 2023 10:00 am

Just got back from urgent care, xray shows a fracture and possible pin damage.
It's funny to me how I literally gave myself a break. After you had initially said that I ran around in my mind about how I should be giving myself break. I had just been reading some fascinating information about trees, and how they actually determine which branches will break, and how they counter balance thier lifeforms energy via the zylum and phylum and will shift their weight after a large branch is broken in a storm or traumatized so that the whole tree does not topple over and die. The trees self prune and give themselves a break.

Yes, with me and my impressionable nature and my Martian following orders .....I am very child like and need certain things spelled directly out, with out leaving me guessing and looking to deeply into things.
I did not notice the aspect of transiting Uranus to my natal Pluto, does that mean that Uranus is also aspecting my Asc/Des Venus/Mars midpoint? I definitely have felt Mars get moving lately, forgot about my EP point getting aspected. Maybe then when T Mars becomes opposite my N. Mars I will have the surgery on my toe.

Veronica
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Re: Veronica (part 2)

Post by Veronica » Sat Feb 25, 2023 11:04 am

Ugh so I really dropped the ball yesterday on a couple of issues. I found myself exaggerating and flat out lying. I lost control of my physical senses and I really feel as if I could have erupted into physical harm if provoked. I removed myself from the situation and went home.

Mars is in opposition to my natal Mars right now and I have had some experiences that were highly reflective of this. I found myself trying to assert my position/right to exist and my rights to my feelings towards another person because I was being attacked for not going above and beyond and serving and helping as much as possible.

I am trying to healthily deal with a situation and relationship that I must have set myself up to have somehow because it's just so bizarre and symbolic and hard.
Her birthdata: Oct. 11 1977 Rochester NYno time known.

My synastry with her from my end is that I want to get as far away from her as possible. I find everything irritating about her, And I feel unbalanced, threatened and uncomfortable around her, even hearing her name or thinking of her elicits a physical pumping of adrenaline in me.

My father loves his drama though and yesterday was a big scene. I could write a mini series drama about all the complex synastry between my whole family and this woman but Ill spare the details.
I finally told my father a huge flat out lie, which I felt sick about doing later after I had calmed down from a morning of Mars button bushing.

I told him that I have a lawyer who helped me get through the 3 legal cases this woman has brought against me, and that due the nature of her character and disposition towards me I have been advised for my own physical well being, health and sanity to not get involved or have any involvement with her at all, and that because I am aware of this character and disposition towards me for me to engage myself in anyway with her could actually bring about legal charges against myself such as enticement, bullying or harassment.

I felt trapped in the moment and it just came out as the only way I could escape his attacks on me, which were brutal reminders of how he never wants/ed anything to do with me because he cant get what he wants and what I can give him makes him feel weak as a man, which is the only way he sees himself apparently.

I actually went in the other room after this attack an checked transits which I had been behind in doing and in seeing Mars opposite my Mars I knew I needed to go home because I didnt want to fight with my father.

I feel such a charge and physicalness, it's so different from when I am calm and content and happy and soft and loving. I dont like it, I dont like feeling that way, triggered by people who appear to really have personal grudge against me and just love to be mean and jerky and do passive aggressive baloney and just all of it, bored, or have some other sort of chemical imbalance of low serotonin or something and need to get a kick from from aperson like a defibrillator.

I thought because I have her birthdata now it might be an interesting example in strong synastry. I really do not want to be triggered into acting out. I do so well in many trying situations, but with this case I just struggle.

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